Winter Blahs

We're emerging from the winter doldrums here on the west coast. Normally we look forward to copious amounts of rain and temps in the 40F/5C range. The past two weeks we've had snow. Ugh. As a transplant from a more continental (read: cold in winter and hot in summer) climate, I LOVE living where we seldom get snow. Thus the past two weeks have been especially taxing to me. Add in the fact that Soulmate used his vacation to tile our countertops and we had no kitchen sink for a week and you can see that it's been hard to keep my sun-loving chin up.




Now, however, the snow is gone and the sink is back along with our lovely new tile counters. Life is good again.

Fish has decided that he wants to nurse all night for the past three nights. I'm hoping this is signaling some sort of developmental milestone (rolling over?) and is NOT a permanent state of affairs. I've given up on sleep for the moment (hence the wee-hours blogfest).

A Book Every Parent Should Read

I've been reading Hold On To Your Kids by Gordon Neufeld and Gabor Maté.

In a nutshell, they say that the reason Western society in going to hell in a handbasket (think gangs, school shootings, bullying) is that we've abdicated our responsibilities as parents. Instead of keeping our kids attached to us, we've allowed (encouraged?) them to become oriented to their peers for values, nurturing, etc.

Not only does this cause discord at home, but it is also at the root of a large number of social and cultural problems facing many communities today.

In addition to explaining the problem at-length, they also offer solutions.

Unfortunately, the first 2/3 of the book is heavy in psych-lingo and I had to work hard to understand the exact nuances of what they were saying - I'd love to rewrite it for them in more accessible language. This is such an important topic that making the message available to everyone should be high-priority.

Of course, they do say that full-time daycare from a young age is pretty damaging, so a lot of folks out there won't want to hear that...

Real Food for Real (Kosher) People

Before I got married, I ate crap. There's no other way to describe it. My only vegetable intake was bag lettuce and frozen green beans. Enter my husband. His mother worked in a health-food store and I believe he ate mostly nuts and seeds growing up. Since we've been married, I eat way more vegetables in greater variety. We strive to eat seasonally, as well, so that our kids are less likely to be turned off fruit by eating a sour orange or mealy apple.

Here's the first meal of many I hope to post that are delicious, easy, and nutritious.

Spinach-Feta Pie

*10 sheets phyllo dough
*melted butter enough to brush each sheet (olive oil would be a likely substitute) and more for sauteing the garlic and onion
*1 bag Europe's Best Chef Style spinach (prob. equiv. to 2 frozen blocks or 2 large bunches of fresh)
*2 cloves crushed garlic
*1 onion, chopped
*1 Tbsp dill
*8 oz feta
*salt to taste

1. Thaw phyllo dough a few hours ahead.
2. Preheat oven to 350.
3. Saute garlic and onion in butter over low heat. Add spinach. I threw the frozen mini-blocks right in and covered the pan with a lid for several minutes, but thaw ahead if you'd like. Add dill, feta, and salt.
4. Brush 10 sheets of phyllo with melted butter and arrange 5 in a pie pan or 9x9 pyrex dish. Pour in spinach mixture. Add remaining 5 sheets of phyllo on top of spinach and roll the overlapping edges to form a "rope" of crust (see photo).
5. Bake at 350 for 30ish minutes. You could also cover the whole thing with plastic wrap and freeze at the point and thaw/bake later.

Saddened, shaken

A few things have happened in the past several weeks: my husband went to the Kinus haShluchim in Crown Heights for 6 days with our rabbi, my husband came back from the kinus at a new level in his yiddishkeit, and the tragedy in Mumbai took place.

It was HARD having Soulmate gone for 6 days. We haven't been apart for more than 2 days since our wedding. It's hard being the only adult with small children. I have NO idea how single parents cope.

I was thrilled to have him return on a new level in his commitment to Torah and mitzvos (though I confess I was a little afraid he'd "frum out" and want to take things on that I'm not yet ready for - think hassidishe minhagim). I let his enthusiasm infect me and stepped up some mitzvos I had been slacking on as well like washing for bread every time, washing negel vasser, and bentching (yeah, I'm a slacker).

Then came the terror attack in Mumbai. We joined the world in saying tehillim and praying. I've never prayed so hard for anything. I made enough challah dough to take challah with a bracha. I prayed while I was kneading the dough by hand.

I know there are people out there who did much, much more.

But it wasn't enough.

I'm dumbfounded and shocked and bewildered...why? Plenty of great people have written on how we should respond to the murders in Mumbai. I can't go there yet. I'm still angry. I'm trying to channel that anger into taking on one new thing, but I'm not even there yet.

Having kids changes your whole outlook on life. You view tragedy in context and you feel the pain of the mother or father of the victim. But children also distract you. I haven't thought too much about the Holtzbergs because I've been blissfully distracted by my own two sons, baruch H-shem.

And here we are. I have nothing profound to say and no words of comfort for me or you. The world is just a little colder today.

Blue Jean Baby

I bought a pair of real blue jeans today. Yes, they came from Walmart, but they are definitely jeans. I've missed them. I gave up wearing pants before I got married (I had really given them up when I became frum but I secretly wore jeans to work on Fridays occasionally...shh...).

For the past year, skirts have been driving me up the wall. Ever since Hippo got old enough to clutch at them I find myself stopped short whenever I'm scurrying about trying to make supper or do another chore. It stresses me out and makes me short with the kids.

Enter Walmart. They called to me from their jumbled rack and I took them home. All afternoon I flitted around the house. One minute I was climbing the basement stairs without stepping on a skirt, the next I was squatting down easily to help Hippo put on his shoes without revealing my undergarments. Bliss.

What about tea-length skirts, you ask? Feh. Ugly. I'm a domestic goddess in denim and I'll enjoy every minute of it. Just call before you come over. :)

Food, food, and more food

The Frum Family spends a lot of time thinking about food. We are self-professed foodies and are always on the lookout for delicious, healthy, and easy recipes.

Obviously we are strictly kosher. There are currently no kosher restaurants in our small city. We used to spend a lot of time lamenting this fact until I finally managed to convince Soulmate that kosher restaurants by-and-large are poor step-cousins to their treif counterparts. Perhaps this isn't true in NYC, but it's true in Chicago, Seattle, Vancouver, New Jersey, Detroit, Cleveland and many other places I've eaten in kosher establishments. Our rabbi once described the fleishig restaurant in the nearest city of any size as "where you get hospital food at French restaurant prices. Too true.

So, we've come to terms with the fact that we are responsible for creating our own fabulous food and I'll be pleased to share our successes (and maybe some of our failures, if they are spectacular enough).

I'll start with our Hungarian cholent. We aren't big cholent fans around here and generally consider it a waste of good meat. As such, we tend to use leftover meat. Our Hungarian cholent is the exception to this rule. Not only do we use fresh meat, but we even keep the leftovers, if there are any. Last night I made biscuits and dropped them into the bubbling leftover cholent I had reheated. We also added the chicory and mei qing choi that came in our organic veg box last week. Voila - a healthy, easy, and yummy Sunday night supper.


Here's the recipe - adjust to your tastes:

Hungarian Cholent

1 lb of stew meat, browned
1 onion, chopped
carrots (2? 3?)
1 parsnip (I used a turnip last week and liked it better.)
1 sm can tomato paste
1 large can tomatoes
3-4 large potatoes
1 tsp carraway seed
1-2 Tbsp paprika - the hot Hungarian Szeged stuff
salt and pepper to taste

Toss in crock pot on 'Low' and cover with water - cook overnight.

Squash pancakes

I've been collecting squashes lately and decided I'd better starting cooking some. Yesterday I made squash pancakes. Here are the approx proportions:

1.5 c. winter squash
1 c. oatmeal
3 eggs
2 tablespoons sugar

Mix and fry on hot griddle. Great with butter or a little molasses. I tried adding a little molasses to the last bit of the batter and it didn't add much - much better as a topping.